How to gain trust as a stepparent
- Posted on: Apr 30 2023
When your significant other has a child, you want to be able to help as much as possible with raising the child. Being a step-parent allows you to play an important role in the life of the child so that a relationship can be built and so that they can obtain trust with another adult. It is also a great way to enjoy a relationship that is stronger through raising the children jointly.
At first, the child may become shy when they are near you. It is ok when this happens and it will take a while before a level of comfort is felt between you and the child.
In order to help the child feel comfortable and trust you as their step-parent, there are a few things that you can do to help gain trust as a step-parent.
Keep Expectations In Mind
You should be mindful about how involved you will be in the life of the child and remain as comfortable as possible.
Ensure That You And Your Significant Other Are On The Same Page
By communicating, you and your spouse can have a clear understanding of the relationship you form with your step-child. You can ask your spouse certain questions that can bring about a good conversation.
Go Slowly
When you go at a slow pace, the child will be able to remain comfortable. You should not expect the child to show you love or have a fondness for you. You should work on a level of respect.
After 2 years have passed, you need to be depended upon by the child so that you can develop a ritual with the child. This can be done by enjoying things with them on a weekly basis, such as enjoying sports over the weekends. This can create a good relationship instead of having to guide a behavior. These opportunities also allow the child to build trust while getting to know you.
After a level of comfort has been built, there can be more done as far as parenting is concerned as long as all parties agree to it. Plus, it may be dependent upon how old the child is.
Keep the Other Parent in Mind
As a step-parent, you need to be aware of the other parent that the child has and the possibility that they may need to adjust to your position as step-parent. It may be a good idea to not be involved with the other parent so that there are no mixed emotions.
Allow both biological parents to talk about the care of the child as well as other important arrangements that may be needed. However, when the other parent is fine talking with you and setting things in place, then everyone should feel fine. As time goes by, you and the other parent may get to know each other and develop a level of comfort where events may be shared, such as birthdays and other important celebrations. Being a step-parent is not easy and it may take time to gain the trust of the step-child. By knowing that, you are able to take things slow and allow the child to become comfortable and provide respect before taking things further. So if you have any concerns with the step-parenting process, you can contact us to discuss what can work the best to gain trust as a step-parent.
Posted in: Family Law, Uncategorized
